我們也Strida啦!

最近半年的生活越來越豐富和精彩，隨著經濟逐漸穩定和對於人生想法的改變。上週六從groupon goods買了strida摺疊腳踏車，昨天車子寄到了。晚上我一改平時懶惰，非到不得已不出門的習性，邀請小綠眼去買安全帽。現在想想，以前國高中騎腳踏車不戴安全帽真是危險的行為。如果跌倒撞到頭那我美麗的臉不就遭殃了，以前怎麼都不害怕。

小折車寄到公寓管理公司的辦公室，公寓管理經理打電話叫小綠眼快去拿(as soon as possible)，因為箱子"有點大"。因為小綠眼在上班，所以他就派我去拿。於是我就開著汽車把兩大箱子載回公寓門口，在一個人將兩的大箱子拿上來。雖然小折車很輕，只有10公斤，但是不是一手拿一箱。嘆，我真是太遜了。

看到"Made in Taiwan"時心情真是超級高興的!

很期待的開箱中...(為什麼箱子不同大小呢?!)

令我不解的是為什麼小白寄來的時候已經組裝好了，可是小黑卻沒有呢?為了裝椅墊，我們在半夜十點打去給生統師布萊恩，向他借工具箱。

On the Run 數數有幾隻

(Feb 25, 2012)

這兩週的長跑都從白天跑到黑夜

下午看到排排站的海鷗忍不住停下來拍了一張

也跑了四個月了。想想去年暑假，甚至更早，跑個10分鐘就喊要回家，跑完25分鐘就會發脾氣。現在3 miles 算是小跑，5 miles才覺得有練習，長跑沒有8 miles都覺得不是長跑。昨天發現10 miles已經可以在1小時55分內跑完。雖然小時候爸爸叫我跑操場十圈或是騎著野狼遛女兒，但是我從來沒有在跑步上有什麼驚人的表現。短短四個月可以進步這麼多，讓我深深體會人的潛力真是無窮的。只要下定決心，事情是做得到的。

大衛老闆問我為什麼?

因為看著自己可以達成目標，而讓自己相信在混亂盲目的未來，我做得到。

土魠魚米粉湯

土魠魚在韓國超市有賣。經過Google之後，發現土魠魚，又稱鰆魚、馬鮫魚。英文統稱mackerel，但又分Spanish mackerel, king mackerel (台灣常吃的好像是這種)。這次買的是Spanish mackerel。

這次用東南亞品牌的炸粉。

紅豆年糕

今日再次挑戰紅豆年糕，又Q又香，太好吃了。

手工糯米製甜年糕

過年時和布萊恩先生借來的他打調酒的果汁機。過了一個月，總該還給對方了。趁還沒還回去前做個紅豆年糕，順便送果汁機主人一份，當作是租金。

這次的糯米有點不新鮮，所以有種味道。因此我將糯米洗到水幾乎是清澈，泡水一整天，期間換水一次。換新水，在果汁機打成漿。拿一個布袋 (綿製的枕頭套也可以，最後是沒有漂白和染色的布。媽媽之前給我一塊，超感動的)，將糯米漿倒進去。

接下來就是一件費力的工作了：先用水將大部分的水擠出來，再用一桶水將壓在這包米漿上 (如圖)。這地方有點困難的是拿捏要剩多少水。這兩次的經驗是，當手去搓米糰，米糰會自然鬆開為止。

接著加黃糖和紅豆。我用兩杯糯米，3/4杯糖和1杯紅豆。

先放到電鍋用一杯水蒸，年糕定型後，放到蒸籠在中大火蒸30分鐘。

為什麼要放到蒸籠蒸呢? 因為中間才會蒸熟，才會Q，上面才不會積水。

QQ年糕完成

鹹湯圓

手工糯米製鹹湯圓!

Lasagna 番茄波菜千層面

好久沒吃Lasagna。以前做的時候常常麵和料分開，直到前陣子用 Béchamel sauce後才成功。Bechamel sauce 需要牛奶和奶油，但是現在太少用到那兩樣材料，於是嘗試了Ricotta cheese。做值得紀念的是成功的做了蕃茄醬，沒有用罐頭。

蕃茄 3個 切丁

蒜頭 3瓣

Oregano 2 匙

Salt

Pepper

Basil 2 匙

Parsley 1 匙

使用不沾鍋

蒜頭爆香後加入蕃茄

加入香料，鹽和胡椒

蓋起來，中大火10分鐘

小綠眼吃完也沒有拉肚子 (他和美國的奶製品常常處不好)。

My dear valentine

煮了印度咖啡，開了ㄧ罐17元的酒。先去睡了。

這支酒是2009 Cline的 Zinfandel.

整體厚實、有blackberry，和辛辣的印度茄子咖哩成為很好的對比。

On the run - 港的另一邊

週六 6 miles
跑完就下雪了

Life recently

Under the glamerous blog post lies a lonely soul?
That's not quite true.

香蕉各諾拉/喜瑞兒 Granola

又到了做Granola的時候了。從上次到今天中間又做了兩次，其中一次光烤大燕麥 (oats) 和 bran，因為同事給我們添加了"水果"的希臘優格 (Greet yogurt)。

中午離開小綠眼老闆兒子的生日趴，就到CVS拍護照相片 (但很XXX的明天早上又要再去一次，因為照片的頭沒有在正中間...)。CVS的對面是一間Whole Food。

Whole Food 就像是台灣的里仁/雜貨店。大部分的東西都是organic，經過好多次都沒進去過，因為那實在不是graduate student的薪水吃的起的東西。不過因為那是間healthy store，所以就有賣秤重的nuts。也就是我們去的目的啦!

之前的granolo吃膩了，剛好有快爛掉的香蕉，所以就香蕉泥取代油，和減少糖量。

1根香蕉

4 T 黃糖

1 T 楓糖 (optional，用蜂蜜也可以)

2 T 水

1/2 T 香草精

1 t 肉桂粉

4 C oats

1/2 C 核桃 (壓碎)

1/2 C 葡萄乾

nuts & fruits mix - optional

275 F

將oats, nuts, raisin 以外的東西放果汁機，打成香蕉泥。沒有果汁機沒關係，就那叉子搗即可。

將泥和oats混合均勻後放入nuts。

接著放在鋪紙的烤盤

每20分鐘攪拌，大約烤45小時 (溫度低->時間久)。烤至乾有點金黃即可。

放冷後加入raisin and nuts/fruits mix。

T 大匙

t 小匙

C 杯

依據 all recipe 修改的 http://allrecipes.com/recipe/granola/detail.aspx

Sin food - Soan Papdi

週六參加印度友人的訂婚宴，離開時他們致贈印度點心- Soan Papdi。

打開包裝，像是一塊一塊的老豆腐。一片片疊起來，輕輕一拿就碎了，入口即化。

Soan Papdi成分糖、酥油、鷹嘴豆粉、麵粉、小荳蔻、和杏仁。小荳蔻很香，平衡酥油的膩。

一口接一口，罪惡的食物!

On the Run: 腳下的人行道，生活的時光

(就先抱怨一下，自從blogger修改界面後，我就不知道要怎麼navigate了。科技不是應該要越來越好用嗎? 怎麼越來越複雜?)

這是週三傍晚在港邊拍的照片。跑著，發現真的很漂亮。那天溫度宜人，適合跑步的好天氣。我跑了7.5 miles。這個距離對我來說有點是可以輕鬆完成的極限了。輕鬆不是不會累啦!是說跑完不會死掉的那種。


這上一個月的生活真的很充實。煮了很多很多的食物:年糕、發糕、蘿蔔糕、甜米糕，只差沒有豬血糕了。(恩，豬血糕是有點困難>"<，但是好想吃喔。在這邊好像真的沒看到過說...亞洲超市有買豬血，但是我對豬血沒有很大的興趣)。蘿蔔糕很受歡迎。先是朋友聚會上，大家都讚不絕口；小綠眼帶去辦公室，也被搶光。滷了一鍋雞翅，送個了每年去吃感恩大餐的家庭和大衛老闆(和他的室友)。做了核桃葡桃蛋糕、藍莓馬芬(每次都覺得會打成"馬糞")、烤了牛排(這很困難，我真的從來都沒有成功過)、包了140多顆水餃。水餃有韭菜老豆腐和高麗菜。有天早上我準備煎餃給小綠眼當午餐，匆忙中把一些煎焦了。但是小綠眼的同事在一個誤會中，把那些煎餃都吃光了，剩下一顆給他當午餐。

除了煮了很多吃的，我穿了耳洞!

穿耳洞這件事情想了很久，對於用槍還是用針一直猶豫不決。擔心針頭感染、但是使用槍又不被建議。費用也一直是讓我很猶豫的原因。穿耳垂要70元美金耶!真是太貴了。直到有一天我終於受不了，決定親自到我已經google很多次的tattoo parole。在這裡要用針穿只有兩個地方，一個是刺青店，另外一個是醫師診所。可是我詢問過學校醫護室的nurse practitioner，他們說學校沒有可以穿的 :(。經過我仔細詢問、再三確認使用的針頭和清潔等，終於在一種"這樣轉頭出去實在太沒種"的心態下，穿耳洞了。

其實我心嚮可以戴漂亮耳環已經很久了；喜歡小顆內斂又漂亮的鑽石或珍珠，或是誇張富有造型感，海邊超浪漫的。小時候媽媽不給我穿，長大後反而常常思考: 我為什麼想穿，到底是喜歡耳環的什麼? 現在想出來了嗎? 我想可能沒有完全想出來，但是我從20歲開始想，期間嘗試了1小時(這故事改天再說)，但是現在我已經28歲，我還在想這件事情。於是我就鼓起勇去再下課後去了刺青店，完成了心願。


一個月就這樣過了。今天穿了小黑洋裝、披一條帕西米爾圍巾、穿10公分高跟鞋，參加了朋友的訂婚宴。

發糕

今年 託小綠眼嘴饞的福
家裡做了蘿蔔糕 米糕 發糕 也買了年糕

步步高升是ㄧ定要的啦!

要加油呦

‎15歲覺得游泳難，放棄游泳，到18歲遇到一個你喜歡的人約你去游泳，你只好說“我不會耶”。 18歲覺得英文難，放棄英文，28歲出現一個很棒但要會英文的工作，你只好說“我不會耶”。 人生前期越嫌麻煩，越懶得學，後來就越可能錯過讓你動心的人和事，錯過新風景。——蔡康永

Let it snow

新年快樂

水仙開花

水仙花到家裡才不過10天多，今天中午時開了第一朵花。到了晚上時，又多開了幾朵，飄出淡淡的香氣。根也長了，像是鬍鬚一般。

蘿蔔糕

香菇6朵 泡水 切塊

蘿蔔2 1/2 lb 刨絲

紅蘿蔔 1 根 刨絲

蒜5 顆 切細末

泰國粘米粉 半包

水300 cc

醬油

鹽 2 小匙

麻油

白胡椒

蒜頭爆香後加香菇，炒到有香味

加蘿蔔們，水100 cc，炒、翻，加調味

悶到蘿蔔半熟

將剩下的水200cc和黏米粉混合

蘿蔔半熟後關火

米漿倒入，攪拌均勻

倒入蒸籠，放置管子讓水氣可以跑上來

大火15分鐘後 改中大火60分鐘

亦可用電鍋外鍋先一杯水，跳起來再一杯水 (共煮兩杯水)

但是要用10人份電鍋才夠大

小綠眼拍的照片。水仙長大了。

City in the morning

Looking over saint Paul street (left)
Convention center (right)

2012 的旅程 - 軌道的起端

這一年，我們fresh的開始。New apartment, new start.

我們很determine要在1/2好上班前將公寓整理好。小綠眼很堅持一切都要就緒，連衛生紙都必須要買好放在儲藏室。

我們很有效率，打包 - 搬運 - 整理 - 回收紙箱，只花了4 1/2天。

這是一棟1830年代的建築，其中的樓梯和設計都是當初的 (當然馬桶和瓦斯爐不是...)。

MIT 鑰匙

上一篇記錄了誤打誤撞買到的水仙

買到水仙去因為去打鑰匙。拿到鑰匙時，發現是台灣製造了。

Paperwhite 水仙花

誤打誤撞...種了一株水仙花

為了打一付鑰匙，在巴摩開了20miles才完成任務。其中一間打鑰匙的店主要是在賣酒。結帳時發現這個球莖是水耕的，所以買了一個。剛才google一下，發現是水仙。

放在水中不到一週，根都長出來了。

健康活力各諾拉/喜瑞兒 (granola)

Granola是一種早餐燕麥片；營養健康。但是超市賣的多半甜和油，堅果和葡萄乾又少。更何況，每次買都很心疼，因為並不便宜。

在我還沒下定決心自己製作前，一直覺得granola很麻煩，又要加很多油(1/2 cup?!)。有天在epicurious看到一個評價很高，又看似健康的，心裡很心動。終於到Aldi買菜時，下定決心買了almond, walnut, raisin, cranberry, honey, and maple syrup。是的...很久沒買那些東西了!

從開始到完成大約要1小時。新鮮最好吃，放了就味道也會跑掉。所以勤勞一點。一次做一週份。

食譜 (我是將份量減半，因為要一週份)

4 c oats (燕麥)

2 c oat bran (小麥麩)

1 c almonds (銀杏)

1 c walnut (核桃)

1/8 c 白芝麻

1/2 t 鹽

1/4 c brown sugar

2 T 楓糖漿

1/4 c 蜂蜜

1 1/2 t 肉桂

1 1/2 t 香草精

1 c 葡萄乾 + 蔓越莓乾

1. 將 oats, oat bran, 堅果, 芝麻等在一個深的鍋子攪勻

2.將salt, brown sugar, maple syrup, honey, oil, 肉桂, 香草放到火上加熱至小滾。留意滾的糖會發泡

3. 將2倒入1，攪勻 (直到覺得oats都有沾到汁)

4. 到在鋪了parchment 或是錫箔子的烤盤 (或用baking dish也可以，但要烤比較久)

325 度 約 30分。每次設定10分鐘，時間到將granola攪拌，使受熱均勻。約20-30分鐘，oats呈金黃色和乾了即可。喜歡香酥的就在烤或悶在熄火的烤箱一陣。

涼了後加入葡萄乾等。放到容器中

如果用cookie sheet烤的時間較短；baking disk較長。

沒乾會發霉

MIT backside of i94 card

Indian Dessert

Rice pudding (Pradeep Quin)

Milk (full)

Rice

Cardamom

Sugar

Cashernut

Sweet raisin

½ gallon of milk + grinded cardamom and start boiling; stir so it don’t stick; color (upper level) is turning light yellowish.

1 ½ C of rice (soak in water); then let napkin absorb more water.

Add rice into slightly yellow milk; keep stirring; (till expand)

Add cashew nut at any point;

When 1 ½ and ¼ turn into ½ gallon. Add the last ¼ gallon of milk.

Add sugar.

Shirkhne

Plain yogurt (Indian grocery store)

Sugar

Cardamom (power and full seed) –key flavor

Put yogurt into cotton cloth to drain water. Keep in refrigerator overnight; manually remove water in the morning till no water running out;

Add sugar and cardamom, keep stir till sugar mix. (stir till you like the consistency)

Canada Dry Ginger Ale

Canada Dry Ginger Ale

(September 9, 2011). It is very rare for me to drink sodas and I only drink a few of them: Coke Zero (hate regular coke), root beer, and Dr. Pepper. There are a few sodas that I will absolutely not drink – prefer to thirst to death – the orange soda.

My boss LOVES Canada Dry Ginger Ale. This is purely from my observations. He also drinks the orange soda and very occasionally, regular coke. I believe he does not like diet coke but I may be wrong. (This original post was written in September 9, 2011. After 4 months of continuous monitoring (stalker!), I am certain that he DOES NOT drink diet drinks). The best ginger ale I have tasted is from a local pizza shop in Baltimore City, Iggies. Their ale is stored in glass bottles and very different from the mass produced commercial ones.

I don’t think I like Canada Dry Ginger Ale very much. This is the 10^th hour into my journey. I believe I still have…23 hours. Horray for advance technology and the “flat” world.

One of my friends is extremely productive while flying. In fact, he sometimes joke all his work is done while on plane. Let’s see how productive I’ll be.

Time forward to January 5, 2012, I randomly stumble into this document. It occurs to me that I had no idea why I entitled this post “Canada Dry Ginger Ale.” In the brief paragraphs above, I made no indication that I was in fact, drinking Canada Dry Ginger Ale (or Ginger Ale at all), while I was writing the post. In fact, I did not even explicitly write that I was drinking soda. I had said “it is very rare,” which means that “in the present, the statement is true.” It is not saying that “I am drinking soda as we speak (or type).” So what was my point? I have absolutely no idea.

Although, I am very certain to say that I was not very productivity throughout the journey. I perhaps had (can barely remember) drank some beers and watched movies. Other than that, I believe the flight was terrible. I had to fight with a middle age women for a seat that I had earn, with enormous efforts.

Arbuckle's Irish Cream

下午，小綠眼說要煮咖啡。

小綠眼公司的姊姊在office holiday lunch party上送大家Arbuckle's Irish Cream 咖啡粉。這包是這週的第二種調味咖啡了，第一包是公司的另外一位姊姊給的Godiva Chocolate Coffee。我們很少喝flavored coffee，總覺得怪怪的。

煮起來還滿香，不過沒有Godiva Chocolate的濃郁。

2011聖誕限定巧克力收藏之二

Xin 回西班牙看父母，和家人至比利時帶回來的。好吃!

2011 聖誕巧克力收藏之一

同事卡爾的姊姊從義大利帶來的

Wise words to remember

Molasses Cookie 黑糖餅乾

Molasses是美國的一種液狀黑糖。(參看薑梨餅乾)

Molasses Cookie像是"冬季限定"，多半到了感恩節才開始做，在聖誕節時，屬於家家戶戶都要bake一下的。

今天終於有時間和心情做餅乾了，選了這個想做很久但是都沒有行動的餅乾。這次很認真的用了食譜上的奶油用量! (所以很不健康 XD)

1 1/4 杯麵粉

2 t 小蘇打

1 t 肉桂

3/4 t 薑粉

1/2 t all spice (丁香粉:黑胡椒: 肉豆蔻:肉桂=1:1:1:1)

1/2 t clove (丁香粉)

1/4 t 鹽

1/2 杯 奶油

1/3 杯黃糖

1 large egg

1/3 杯 黑糖漿

粉類篩過

奶油和糖打發。加入其他液體類

加入粉類

使用手沾水，製作2.5公分大小球狀，一邊沾糖粉。放置在鋪紙 (parchment paper) 的烤盤上

375 度 10-12 分鐘

沒有照片，已經被大家都吃完了!

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Molasses-Crinkles-231214

Achievement

老闆自從知道我要去到跑華府搖滾馬拉松去跑21公里後問我，你從跑步中得到什麼? 為什麼你要去做那件事? (Why do you do it? What do you get from it?)

我跟他說，這是我在一切生活和未來不確定中，讓自己維持清醒的方法 (maintain my sanity)。從跑步中獲得成就，告訴自己：如果我可以每週進行四天跑步訓練，每次至少跑五公里，維持18週，那我應該可以繼續在不知道未來在之下走下去。

那就是我的感覺。每當我到了臉書後就會有點depress。朋友們都有正當的工作 (工作，不是房子 etc)，可我還在寫期末報告。

我真的不知道自己的未來在哪裡...

Apple crisp 蘋果酥

美國蘋果據說百百種。那天買了麥金塔和羅馬蘋果，做了蘋果酥。聽說要做好吃的蘋果派(等蘋果甜點)就是買種都用一顆。

Macintosh Apple x 2
Rome Apple x 2
Vanilla 1/4 teaspoon
Sugar 1/4 c
Lime juice
Nutmeg 1/4 t
Cinnamon 1/2 t
Jiffy pie crust mix 1 1/2
Oats 1 c
Egg 1

400F 15 min, 375F 25 min
Core and slice apple thin. Toss with sugar, vanilla, nutmeg, cinnamon, lime juice, with apple.
Mix oats, jiffy mix and egg. It will look crumble. Pour apple into glass dish, spread crumble over them. Bake.crumble

June 8

No morning meeting
Weed cleaning not thorough

June 9

Intern edu session is not schedules at a regular time.

Finish weeding and need to call for next assignment.

Are doing nothing.

The income from member shares support the operation of the farm, including salaries and other overheads. The manager makes less than 15000 per year. Intern makes 500 per month.

Anything with seeds is fruit. Peas, cucumber, pumpkin...

Beans are planted after rain when the soil is crumble yet not chunk.

Plants are vulnerable when it is watered. So too much water is bad

Peas need to picked everyday. The plants will produce more.

June 8

Weeding

Snow peas like cold temperature so the weeds are fine because they create shades.

Garlic scapes: garlic forms cloves after the scapes are cut. The scape are two weeks per season.
Idea for cooking garlic scapes: stir fry with bacon for pasta.

Management
Differences in standards make text communication inefficient. The manager text jobs of the day. But the interns have different standards and so they weed thoroughly than needed. As a result, the beds was used for direct seeding which was not the original plan.

No water irigation and so water by hands. Will is broken and not fixed, at least two weeks.

The board do not do strategic planning.

貪食

飲食的節奏亂了。無論是巧克力或垃圾食物或點心...這是ㄧ個很遭糟糕的墮落。

最近開始運動，體力變不好了。肌耐力和肺功能都退步了。退步很快，進步很難。

克制自己的慾望，不要貪吃了。

論文啤酒

Hoegaarden, Belgian wheat beer.
Sunday afternoon...ah,

胡亂寫了垃圾。根據小綠眼的說法，有寫總比沒有好。

November chill

這週我已經做了三件迷糊事了。
我先是將要寄到美國境內的信隨包裹寄回太台灣，接著寄信前沒有將開口封起來，最後記錯上課時間所以坐在寒風中ㄧ小時等老公。

照片為傍晚校園景

瀕臨絕種巧克力

中午和同事吃午餐，他太太準備甜點給我。這是公平交易的可可製作黑巧克力，非常黑，些微甜。好吃!

No impatience please

You don't get to be impatience with me. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever. I deserve to be respected, including being treated with patience. Go sign up for something else if you don't want to. Seriously, not joking.

Wedding cake

今天上課Politics of Health,老師給我ㄧ個經驚喜!她準備了杯蛋糕慶祝我結婚了。

旁邊的酒瓶是香檳蠟燭。

Yoga under the sky

今天的瑜珈課在學生活動中心/餐廳前上課。我們在棚內但路過的人都很好奇 。在天空下的瑜珈經驗很棒，像是被活化(liberating) .

A new adventure

A new phone. A new experience

The season

I feel vulnerable and I am not particularly well. I don't know what's wrong, maybe it is the season. I long for the sunny days when the warmth of the air cheer me up. The sense of security from the I don't know what. October is a brutal season.

I have been in this state of mind for four days. Experience tell me that why the mood comes, all I can do is wait. Patience is time, time is patience. I can only wait for it to pass by.

複製過去的錯誤

今天下班時新來的上海人問我有沒有做一個project，還有負責哪部分。我問他是什麼緣故他要問我。他說老闆要他修正總編輯給的一些評論。

總編輯要他改的是圖表中的顏色。這些圖表很多都是我做的，所以對於這些錯誤我很在意。我發現這些錯誤的造成是因為我使用上一年的圖表格式，只修改其中的數據。上一年的人到底怎麼畫錯顏色的我不知道，但是顯然複製過去的代價就是複製錯誤。我心情很不好。這固然不全部是我的錯，因為也是老闆叫我修改數據的，但也顯示自己不夠細心。

不過說真的，我看了很久還是覺得那顏色長的一樣。

驚魂記

因為小綠眼要到城裡工作，但是家裡只有一台車，所以我們要開始一起通勤的生活。今天我們6點就起床了，因為要準備早餐、午餐和洗澡。突然在6:20，我聽到敲門聲。那麼早有人敲門是很不尋常，我想大概是自己聽錯了，於是不以為意。

過了不久，門鈴響了。

小綠眼和我看了對方，我心想，大概是有人找錯門了，所以就不予理會。過了幾分鐘，門鈴又響了。這時我開始覺得很恐怖! 是壞人嗎? 美國郊區人在自家被謀殺的電影情節在腦中閃過。大門的位置剛好可以看到廚房的動靜；外面天還很黑，廚房的燈是亮的，我們看不到對方，對方卻看得到我們。我拿起無線電話，我問小綠眼說，我們該打給警察嗎，這種算是emergency嗎?我走到餐廳，發現車門口停了一台車，車燈是亮的。我心想：歐，這個人是針對我們這戶，我該怎麼辦? 這樣應該qualify emergency吧? 警察來不及來怎麼辦?! 總總嚇死人的念頭閃過。

我於是撥了911，這可是我人生中第一次撥打911。警察問我的地址，他問我車子的顏色、特徵。我回警察說，外面那麼黑，我看不出來啊! 警察問我對方的特徵，我說從家裡看不見，只知道是中年男子。警察說，如果對方離開你再撥打回來。於是電話就結束了。

對方還在外面，警察又沒說他們會不會來。我只好期待又patrol car會過來。

這時，這個男子又走進大門敲了門 (我實在快被嚇死了)。小綠眼說要上樓，我說大門旁的窗戶看得到屋內。過了不久，小綠眼說，對方已經遠離大門了。我們彎下腰，迅速地跑上樓，從客房的窗戶往外看。外面的男子帶了帽子，穿白色長褲，看起來180公分高。門鈴又響了，我對小綠眼說：我們忘記帶刀子上樓了。

過不久，警察來了。他下車後用手電筒照了那位男子，接著敲大門。我們去開門，警察問：這個人說要和彼得去打高爾夫球，他說他沒有找錯房子，你們認識彼得嗎?

我說彼得是我們的室友，但是他去狄斯耐樂園玩了。那位男子走過來，一聽他說話，神秘男子的身分終於真相大白：锵锵，原來是賣我們的房子的仲介。

他當然沒有找錯房子，因為房子是他賣出的阿。

警察在臨走前開玩笑一番 (實為抱怨，小綠眼說)，警察說：你看這人一身高爾夫球打扮 (心中os：我又不打高爾夫，哪知道裝扮阿)，又開BMW (心中os: 誰看得到那是BMW阿，更何況壞人也可以開BMW阿)，他長得哪像壞人阿??? (心中又os：壞人臉上又不寫 - 我是壞人，請遠離我)。

驚魂記於是在一陣警察抱怨，仲介無辜，我們嚇死中結束。

A Journey About to Begin

In about 9 hours, my roommate will drop me off at the train station; I will hopefully arrive at NYC at noon. For lunch, I plan to eat Pepeye's. They say it is better than KFC (no, I don't think KFC is good at all...). I'll then take Subway E toward JFK airport. It should take an hour. The flight is at 4:45 p.m., so I at least have to arrive by 2:45. This means I have to leave NYC Penn Station by 1:30.

I am so nervous.

This is probably the real me. I may seem "tough" (my boss has been describing me as the "tough sister" lately), but the inside, I am jello... indecisive...can't even decide what I should wear on the plane (Haha).

I will land in L.A. and wait for four hours. I can't decide whether I should go try "in-and-out." It is famous for the burgers...but I don't feel like burgers...maybe I'll ask the Taxi driver to do a drive-through...Honestly, I rather sit in a bar and drink Margarita. Booz...so me.

At 1 a.m., I will board the flight. It is a many hours flight, five movies maybe?

I am packed, I have schedule a breakfast date with my aunt. We'll have 蘿蔔絲餅 with 7-11 coffee. Such an interesting combination, but so me. There is just a tiny problem, I have no idea where my grandmother used to buy that.

I think I will go shop for bra and shoes after that...Problem again, I have no money. My aunt owes me about 2 grands, but the items I purchased for her is at my husband's place...Urg...

The truth is I am VERY nervous. This seems so surreal. I booked my tickets in January and tomorrow is the day...Tomorrow, I will being the journey and I don't feel prepare. Ah....

It is absolutely understandable if you have no idea what on earth I am talking about. I don't think that was English at all.

The perfect world - 就聽我抱怨吧

長期以來接了一些隨手做的翻譯工作，多半沒什麼建設性，現在也很少接了，那些文章多半很無聊又浪費國家資源。早上一個先前的客人要我幫他修改，他也附上了他"自己修改的"。看了真想昏倒。他自己(或他請別人)改了之後，中英文意根本就完完全全的不相同，也沒有使用"對仗"法，第一是有看到用粗體寫文章。

(請看以上三句，看起來混亂和沒有秩序，這就是他自己修改的英文後的樣子)

後來用看到一個親戚的FB相簿。有時我在想，同一個地點(火車上)，照了3張只有臉的照片照片、然後到了一間餐廳，又照3張臉的照片，BTW臉占了照片的1/2，另外1/2是另一個臉。這樣的照片有何意義。身為一個看照片的人，我既不知道你去了哪裡，也不知道那好不好玩好不好吃，那有什麼用處嗎? 人又沒長特別漂亮。

繞了一圈，我脾氣還真不好。這些根本就沒有什麼。

低收入戶保險年度績效評估

HealthChoice Wavier Evaluation真是一個讓人想死的。我們的評鑑/評估跟台灣的應該有點不一樣，基本上我們是幫client(我們的client就是健保局...)製作評估報告。這評估報告做了大概10禮拜。

現在每天我腦中都出現這些名詞

HealthChoice,

MCO,

Evaluation,

PAC,

Measures,

Improvement,

Percentage,

Percent

Proc freq (SAS Commend)

bar chart

辦公室e-mail inbox的每封信開頭都是

HealthChoice XXXX

阿! 這就是我的工作阿

印度電影清單

最近真是忙翻了。白天要上班，晚上要social，還有積欠半年的專題...

今天做一繁瑣的歸檔、傳照片等雜事，把一些喜歡/看過的印度愛情電影整理起來

Devdas

Shadow of Times

Calcutta, India

A 型人格

今天肚醫師跟我說他的新朋友對我的評價：追求完美以致於給自己壓力太大。肚醫師又分享他先前做grand round時看不懂paper，最後他導師給他的評語：給自己壓力太大。

我反問肚醫師一句，那他們有說如何不要追求完美嗎? (like technically, what are the approaches and methods)

有時候那根本不是追求完美，那只是要把事情給做好。或者是說，其實要把事情做好的人有時也滿可憐的，他們不知道要怎麼減低"標準"。不知道這算不算是強迫症，改天來看看DSM-IV好了。

Why?

I am so angry. Is shit-rain an actual term? (Or shit-rains, raining shit...?)

How stupid can the UPS be? World class logistic my ass. The driver obviously did not deliver the package to my door step. In fact, he didn't even ring the door bell. Yes, I am certain the driver is a he. All the UPS drivers are male, most of them have muscles and good looks. Yes, that's also a fact. My friend who worked for Fedex during college said he felt like being harassed by all the ladies and blank.

Before UPS was the carrier from USPS (United State Postal Service). The carrier was just too lazy to check that the package was supposed to be forwarded. Then the other USPS workers are just lazy as well. Seriously, first you told me it is not there; then it shows up magically and you send it to Chicago for it to transit to Taiwan (knock on wood).

And what is it with everyone in the office. The all-about-sex colleague is not doing data analysis. But it is data analysis season (it is always data analysis season). There are tons of data and you are on data analysis probation?

Then there is the other colleague who works exactly 5 hours each day (we are on 5 hours shift). Like when the clock tick 2:00, the colleague is off to do his/her own business. Really?! So then occasionally he/she works 20 extra minutes (for example), then he/she will send an e-mail (yes, you read it right) to our boss: Hi boss, I work extra 20 minutes today. Seriously, I work overtime nearly everyday. (Okay so I want to keep my job, eat me).

It's like crap rain. Ever heard of that expression? Most likely not cause I made it up.

So last week at the monthly supervisor meeting, I told my boss that "my observance (not complain) is almost everyone in our unit is unhappy." So she asked me why. I said, "well, A is unhappy, maybe because we have the annual evaluation. B has been unhappy for the past few months. C is upset. D says A is 'giving her crap' and I quote that." So my boss responded, "A is anxious because the new client is rather high maintenance. C is upset and I am okay with that. He should be upset. B needs to go home."

She skipped D, I guess there is no much to say about D.

Okay, so after a page long of venting, I now feel much better.

People are just crazy. Oh and the drugstore messed up my purchase today but I am waaaayyyyyyy too tired to fix it. For God's sake, (and forgive me for saying this), but they are just plain stupid. I am so sick and tired of them that I may as well as start using department store beauty products.

Never Say Never

標題和內文沒有特別關係，只是pandora剛好放到這首，突然覺得自己寫得出字來了。

今天，是上班甚至是來美國以來，第一次感到自己比沙子還小，是那麼孤單。

如果跑到一半卻下起了大雨...

今天我們又去港灣步道練跑步。四月小綠眼和我的目標是要從Canton跑到Henderson's Wharf Inn，來回約6.5公里。跑到一半卻下起了大雨。

小綠眼的腳比較長，所以他每次都跑在我前面。(當然他體力比我好也是一個原因啦XD)

剛開始只是毛毛雨，後來越來越大，最後變成"傾盆大雨"。衣服褲子都濕了，視線幾乎看不見。可是我的車子還在出發處，即使我要放棄，我也需要回到車上吧!

那時我深刻體會到:只要踏出去了，不管再困難也只好做完，不然要在路邊站著冷的要死等著雨停嗎?

為什麼那麼多人還是選擇要跑長跑?

因為每一次完成目標後都更確信地知道自己其實做的到。

附上跑步路線圖 (從右邊的canton跑到圖上的左邊Henderson Wharf再折返)

青蔥麵包

麵粉 4 C

酵母 1 1/2 t

白糖 1T 1t

溫水 1 1/2C

鹽 1 t

青蔥 一把 (8大支)

發 三十分鐘

翻轉 發一小時

425度 25分鐘 (需要修正 底部焦掉)

idiot proof巧克力蛋糕

這是我所知道最簡單的巧克力蛋糕，但是相當好吃:口感佳、綿密，但不硬。

做失敗是有點困難...

糖 1 杯 (白和黃各1/2)

麵粉 1 3/4 杯

baking powder 1 1/2 t

baking soda 1 1/2

可可粉 3/4 杯

鹽 1 t

蛋 2

無糖yogurt 1 杯 (也可以用sour cream)

油 1/2杯

熱水 1 杯

將粉類篩過，接著加入蛋、yogurt、油 攪勻

之後倒入熱水

攪勻 (差不多就可以)

350F 25 min

這次是用長方形的金屬盒 裡面舖 parchment paper

筷子拔出來乾淨即可

note 1: 原來的食譜用兩杯糖

note 2: 沒有yogurt or sour cream, 就用milk+ 1T 醋

沒有照片 因為被吃完了

Note安全產品

beautypedia

cosmeticsdatabase

goodguide

cosdna

the body shop aloe

loreal bare naturale mineral

city Veil

L'oreal UV Perfect SPF 50+++

小地雷

Ageless Essentials® Continuous Hydration Night

大地雷

Neutrogena Ageless Essentials Continuous Hydration SPF 25

原來在波士頓看到的人手一個菜市場包是...法國名牌阿

我不是一個關心時尚的人，是一個觀察環境的人。

辦公室來了一個法律系的實習生，他拿了一個粉紅色的Le Pliage (我也不知道怎麼念，這是法文)。後來去波士頓，看到每個妹手上都拿一個這樣的袋子。款式簡單，顏色豐富，讓我很納悶為什麼大家都拿一樣的袋子。

遠遠看，這袋子長的真普通。材質也沒有很特殊，像是塑膠布，上面有一塊皮和一個扣子，所以想必是可以摺起來，用成小小的放在書包，攜帶方便。因為LOGO實在太不起眼了，雖然拉鍊的扣環看起來有設計感，但我還是以為

"這是某個百貨公司的贈品吧!"

又因為實在太多人拿了，偏偏在巴爾地摩和紐約都沒有看到這樣平平撞包的景象，所以我就更加覺得

"波士頓的女孩真有趣。這應該真的是某個贈品吧!"

雖然我心裡覺得這好像是贈品，但有又隱隱覺得波士頓這個東北角的妹們應該沒有這麼"平民"吧。所以嘗試在Amazon看這個包是不是某個暢銷款。Amazon找尋菜市場包失敗。

就在我晚間看奇摩新聞時，連進一個網頁，哈，終於讓我看到了。

原來這個包是 Longchamp (long champion的縮寫? 長冠軍?)的Le Pliage。共有12個顏色。要價USD$145。材質：聚醯胺(尼龍)。

$145元的尼龍袋

問：尼龍是塑膠嗎?

原來我是非常白癡的人

其實我最近心情不好，這並不是什麼新聞，因為心情不好是我的專長。
只不過我在自己的網誌晃了一下，看了過去的一些文章，突然覺得其實我的生活還滿有趣的；充滿了新奇的事情(我自己這樣覺得啦)，然後又常常打出一些很白癡的話，舉一些似是而非的例子；有時咄咄逼人，而且有很多錯字。
2006年 6篇

2007年 18篇

2008年 12篇

2009年 71篇

2010年 48篇

(我剛才excel做了直方圖，本來想要依據標籤再做一個圖，但是很多文章都沒標籤。做研究不謹慎，data collect不齊全，要加強)

看完之後心情好了一點。

2010年三月有幾篇很好笑的。

孤獨

兩個人也可以很孤獨。

一個人的人多半覺得兩個人就不會孤獨。於是很希望變成兩個人。
直到有一天，兩個人中的一個人發現，兩個人也可以孤獨。

兩個人只是不孤單，每天(或常常)有個伴；孤獨卻是一種心理狀態*。

+++ +++ +++
又是一篇浪費版面的廢文。寫作是一種therapy；直到我能說得出真心話前，我都會一直處在現在的泥沼中。孤獨的一個人憤怒。uurrggghhh >"<


* 根據教育部國語辭典簡編版，

孤獨有三解釋：
1.禮記 禮運 幼而無父和老而無子的人
2.單獨
3.孤單寂寞

孤單有一解釋：
單獨無依

說再見

A time for everything
Ecclesiastes 3:1-
A Time for Everything
For everything there is a season,

a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.

A time to plant and a time to harvest

A time to cry and a time to laugh

A time to grieve and a time to dance

該是時候了，但其實我沒有準備好。

過去的將近一個月，白天很難專心，晚上很難入睡。躁動不安。

我不知道該怎麼辦，我不知道要說什麼。

別人的安慰是好心，可是我聽了卻很生氣。

我有很多話，多半是很多憤怒。我變得很生氣，生氣世界。

可以打包行囊滾回去了嗎?

好 所以我超遜的，只是因為機歪的總體經濟分析把我搞的要瘋掉，昨天遇到智障的店員，加上未來一整個不明朗，所以我想要滾回去了。

偷偷的走

阿嬤怪阿公是「偷偷的走」。他走的時候，小雲帶阿嬤去新光醫院門診，家裡沒其他人（約兩點多，打電話問阿公，阿公有接電話），過了下午五點，阿嬤回到家，看到阿公已身倒在床前地板上，她試著叫醒「清阿！清阿！」，接著叫小雲打救護車，通知大舅媽「爸爸暈到了」。小雲聽119建議，對阿公做CPR，救護人員到時，也是CPR；告知家屬要送醫，阿嬤說：不用送醫了。事後我看了死亡書上寫著：心肺衰竭死於2月22日下午4時。

小雲說當她回家時，先看到廚房的瓦斯有小火苗燒著，聽到阿嬤叫她打119時，去房間看阿公，阿公眼睛睜開著，嘴巴張著，手已冰冷。

阿嬤描述著：阿公已換上乾淨的內褲，睡褲的兩管已穿到膝蓋下，躺在地上，一脚直伸，另一脚彎曲著；我們推測，阿公可能是站起來穿褲時倒地的。

本週一，阿公已做過肺功能檢查，預定週三斷層掃描。

我們每人都知道該照顧自己更多，也要照顧好阿嬤。

好累

我厭倦念書，應付考試，承受教室裡不平等的權利。

學位只是一張紙

在美國工作

在異國工作的心情好複雜

要有禮貌但有不能太過於謙遜

遇到笨蛋又只好默默接受 (不然要怎樣，事後跟老闆說他是笨蛋嗎?)

寫e-mail的措辭要小心，確定用字和句意是對事不對人，沒有指責對方的意思。

適當的時候要打圓場和閉嘴。這些事情也許在職場上都是相同的，無論在哪一國。

但是當換了一種語言和文化，困難度就變得高。

華人中的禮多人不怪在西方並不適用。

不是你的錯就不要禮貌性的我不對

真是一大挑戰

Week 2 class 1

這個老師實在太機車了，所以我決定要好好記錄上課，期末evaluation時大電他一番。

He is arrogant. He constantly saying: do you know what I mean. He sets the rules that students should communicate to him in person because he does not listen to voice mails and have too many emails. He also said he will not reply to emails.

First, he does not show appreciating of students' questions, especially when the questions is simple but crucial. For example, what format does he want for the assignment. One student asked, "what is the font, size, etc?" He replied, in a way that the student asked a stupid question, " the standard size 12, margin one inch." He suggested that students' ought to think if the font is too small, it will be difficult for him to see. Another student inquire about spacing. He replied as if it is a dumb question that "it should be single space...the assignment is one page only. I don't want 250 words..."

Two, he give students nicknames. For example, he called some "math guy."

Three, he does not seem to prepare for "this" class. The slide used in this class was originally prepared for a speech outside of UMBC. In addition, this was not the topic listed in the syllabus. He said he was jump around, talking about what is the interesting topic or current. However, this course is a in a seminar format. Thus, the randomness is not all that appropriate.

Finally, throughout the class, he showed that his personal preference and interest is more important. Some examples include do not expect him to reply to e-mails or listen to voice mail (consequently, if message is not delivered, the student is accountable); set tedious rules on how the assignment should be turned in (e.g. Assignment # 1 3 Euro questions). While these are tiny things, it just show that this person is inconsiderate of others.

The classroom should not be a extreme unbalance of power, especially at higher education. Instructors and students should be mutually accountable. This is a required course for the students, so students have no choice but to take it. Is this instructor the only person to teach this course? Is this his choice of teaching it? If so, does that grant him the right to be a tyrant in the classroom?

為了我們的project，今天終於試了三件衣服。以上兩件是小綠眼沒有昏倒的。經過今天的經驗，結論是：

1. 我太小隻

2. 我太小隻

3. 我太小隻

就連2號都太會掉下來...看來我需要吃胖一點

梨薑蛋糕

Pear and Ginger Cake

去年感恩節之後，迷上於薑汁和黑蜜糖 (molasses)的香味。試了幾種molasses的蛋糕，但是都過於黏膩。

我是一個做東西看家裡有什麼再去找食譜的人，沒想到有西洋梨、薑、黑蜜糖的組合，當然就高高興興的試試。

食譜中用的allspice可用cinnamon, clove, black pepper 和nutmeg取代。基本的組合是1單位allspice需要cinnamon (1/2) and clove (1/2)。但是也有人加nutmeg and pepper。我就是每樣都用1/4單位。但1/8t實在很小匙，所以就自由心證啦。

小綠眼說很好吃，叫我把食譜留下來 (真難得)。

1 1/2 cups flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1/8 teaspoon ground allspice

1/4 teaspoon salt

2/3 stick unsalted butter

1/4 cup water

1/4 cup packed dark brown sugar

1/2 cup molasses

3 large eggs

1/4 cup grated peeled ginger

1 pear

350度
將烤盤上塗奶油再裹麵粉 (我是用9x13x2吋
玻璃)

1. 篩麵粉和乾料
   
2. 奶油和水一起融化
   
3. 黑蜜糖和糖打勻，加蛋(一次一個)
   
4. 加粉類攪勻 (輕、柔、勻即可)
   
5. 加入奶油水和薑
   
6. 倒入烤盤，把西洋梨隨意排一排
   
7. 烤35分鐘
   

有關molasses
http://mypaper.pchome.com.tw/vicky88/post/1313399872

不肯面對自己

People hate to change; I am no exception.

今天不知怎的想幫網誌換新造型，沒想到除舊布新(成語是動詞嗎? 應該是要用"欲"除舊布新嗎?)的下場就是只能選新範本，再也無法(這並不全然是正確的；我可以修改html) 在照片上寫的"Happiness Will Come Through"，然後下面接一串"成就快樂巴拉的"。(恩，我嘗試了一小時；青春阿~)

昨天出門洗衣服前開了實體信箱(有個郵差會把信件放入的那種)，收到一張明信片。隨便看了一眼，關鍵字: 西岸、happy birthday、merry christmas、寄件人XXX。

放回信箱。鎖上。

小綠眼問我那誰寄的。我說XXX。睡前，我對小綠眼說，我生日是三個月前的事情；聖誕節是兩個月前的事情，地址是三個禮拜前問我的，那張明信片寄的也太慢了。

這是數月來其中一件令我忿忿的事，但我怎麼這樣計較? 沒有感謝別人的祝福，卻想要在"明信片"上寫 "查無此人" (郵件若有寄件者地址，信件會被退回；但明信片沒有"from: whom and where"；想要寫"查無此人"這個衝動足以凸顯我的荒謬。)

與人的關係越來越疏離。"沒有朋友"是自己為了要繼續孤僻的藉口，不想與人相處或連絡才是真正的原因。必須區別的是自己並非懶惰(想要做而不做謂之懶惰)，而是不想要。

不肯面對自己。

因為逃避自己的情緒，因為不想要面對自己，所以沒有寫下生活的心得、煮的食物、承受的壓力、對自己的期許、對他人的生氣、對世界的不解。這是懶惰。

每天都奄奄一息但卻假裝很行。

突然覺得自己很可笑。

2010年 三月 星期五 紫色金剛車壞掉

It isn't really about "a broken car." It is the shock.

To say it was a trauma would be overrated.

I was on the bridge, in the car, and trying to speak. I tried to stay calm but my heart was racing. It isn't even rational. But I didn't know whom I could call for help. The only phone book I have is the numbers in my cell, and there aren't that many numbers.

I sat there waiting for my car to be repaired. The clock ticked and ticked. From 10 to 12 to 2 to 4. I didn't know if I should go ask them or if I should stay put. I didn't know how much they'd charge me. I didn't know how much it would cost me. I didn't know if I have enough money. I didn't know if I don't have enough money, would that person let me leave. I didn't have a credit card.

I remember vividly that I took 100 cash into my purse that morning. I usually don't bring cash with me. I almost brought a camera, just because I thought I might want to take a picture of dad and I at the airport. I didn't wear socks because I figure I would be home soon. I didn't eat breakfast because we left at 5:45. I only had two sips of coffee.

That day was colder than usually.

I watched MTV for 9 hours.

Then we were told that only three cylinders are working. We drove back on 295 and the temperature was too hot. The alert sound keep went off. We were told not to go over 50. When the speed is too low, the car starts tumbling.

Then I called the repair shop. He told me to go to a gas station and check the water. I don't know which is the water tank. We go off the highway, but we couldn't see a gas station. We had to make a decision on which way to turn. It was dark and cold.

Then the car cooled down but we can't get the engine to start and run. We tried and tried. We successfully drove 50 yards, then the engine went off. We were in the middle of a intersection. There were cars behind us. We tried and tried. Then we slide into a residential parking lot. We had to make a decision.

Then i called my auto mechanic's shop but it was answering machine. Then I called his Dad's shop. The number was redirect to his cell somewhere and he couldn't hear me at first. I was afraid that he doesn't know me. But then he probably did.

I called the tow truck. He asked me where I was. I couldn't clearly describe my location. He asked what streets am I on. I ran out the car to check. I told him I am opposite of Harley Davidson Motorcycle. I was outside the car looking at the street signs, Wei was yelling from the window: tell him we are opposite the Harley Davidson shop... He asked for my name and number, told us to wait around 45 to 60 minutes, then we hang up. I called again because I forgot to ask if he can give us a ride back. I also asked for his name. Then we waited and the tow truck came. It was cold. My feet were cold.

It was a fancy tow truck. Not the kind that leave your rear wheels rolling on the ground. The kind that your whole car is on the truck. The interior was fancy. I knew it was going to cost a lot. I didn't have a choice. I didn't ask the price. I knew I didn't have to pay him because the car will be towed to the repair shop and the Dad will bill me later.

What if I didn't bring my cellphone like I usually don't.

What if I didn't have 700 dollars in my checking account to pay for fixing the car a the garage.

What if I didn't have the 100 dollars of cash to pay for the first tow.

What if no one picked up the phone that morning.

What if Susannah hadn't help us find a tow company.

What if I didn't have the number to the Dad's shop.

What if the Dad didn't pick up the phone.

What if my cellphone battery died.

What if Wei's cellphone battery also died.

For the whole day, I ate a piece of bread, a hot dog, a can of root beer, a tiny candy, and two sips of coffee.

I came home at 9:30 and ate pizza and beer.

I am frightened. I can't tell Wei about this. We hadn't been able to get along for two days.

all day every day

I feel the condition is not stable but my informal therapist thinks even if it is unstable, I seem to function alright. I can sleep, can eat, can go to work, can maintain my weekly jog.

But I am in a bad mood, all day every day. I am irritable and impatient. I am tired and stressed.

I stopped going to my real therapist because the center upset me two weeks ago. It is very stupid of me. The center has to deal with one less case but I actually need the sessions. So, stupidity on my behalf.

These are just several lines of meaningless and incomplete sentences.

This is my sulking

I didn't perform very well at work today because my mind was preoccupied with the news I got yesterday. D-boss told me that Center has not sponsored H visa since 2005. This is terrible news. I was counting on a full-time job and H visa after this contract ends. Where will I go now?

And hence, while I was so proud of putting tables together without being told to do so, I completely forgot to include three categories, which means that in terms of accomplishing a task, I failed and the extra work of putting tables is useless. This is me sulking.

I am not at all excited with life. I am tired. I have countless papers to write, and tons of papers to read. I am constantly debating when and where to get gas because I don't have the cash to do it. I tell myself not to eat non-essential food because every dollar I save is one extra dollar to spend. I can write a list of things I want for birthday and Christmas, but what is the point? I can't afford to get my hair cut. I wore a skirt to work today because you can't wear the same outfit to work two days in a row. I only have two work pants, and one is in the laundry basket.

This is me, stuck. Oh yes, I should be grateful for the daily bread. Can bread turn into words? Oh dear Lord, may I exchange the daily bread for term papers?

blog writing

寫字是一種習慣。每天寫是一種恆心。

爸送了我一台新的筆電。11吋，電池效能很好，輕巧的一台讓我可以隨時用打字的方式記錄事情。網路的訊息很豐富，更需要有效的管理。

這學期很忙，但是我希望自己可以有把事情都做好。

the bowling alley

first three were hit

then two more down

third time went into the ditch

later missed all

.

.

.

.

finally stroked all

then it ended. Round Two. Next Life.

This summer, everything was out of place

我站在這裡，一杯一杯，我陪你喝。但明天醒來，你依舊悲傷，我依舊只能站在這裡。我帶不走，你的悲傷，即使我願意。

我知道你悲傷，但我無奈。我能站在這裡，但無法帶走你的悲傷。我願意，但無法替你悲傷。

我知道明天起來可能有點頭痛，我知道這是暑假的最後一天。

這個暑假，八成的事情都go wrong。剩下的兩成是什麼? Seriously，可能是都有搭到飛機吧。

每天每天，都過著一杯兩杯的生活。紅的、白的；葡萄、水果。

終於暑假要過完了。可以還給我了嗎?

喜歡，有點飄的感覺。

I am losing it. Tipping off the balance, I am there.

But I like it there. Just give me one more day, of this disoriented day.

Tomorrow, the couch goes back to a pumpkin. Then Fall comes and let is snow.

Why, did things stand there and burned?