Homebrew

  一陣清香 crisp

中秋賞蛋黃酥和蔥餅

講了幾年，終於終於在中秋節做了蛋黃酥。


自製的紅豆餡少去了市售的油膩和甜膩。剛剛好的味道配上鹹鴨蛋，唯一美中不足的是鴨蛋不夠鹹 嗚嗚...另有蔥餅很多個(好懷念台大附近的蔥餅阿)

貓與大象

My dear sister loves elephants and I love her. And thus when I started the animal collection of knits, elephant was the first mammal selected. 

The cat was for a friend's 7 years old daughter. I asked her to choose the color and she picked light yellow and light green. When I first saw that, I thought - uh-hum, okay. As I knitted, I realized she has a fabulous taste for colors and they matched well. I also realized, ever more deeply, that children's view of world and imagination are unlimited. The girl reminded me to stay imaginative - don't limit myself to the colors that I see. Color is art.

Daughter and mom

I feel awful being so inpatient at my mom. I get irritated and annoyed. Today, she first tried to tell me about nutrition, then she started discussing about Costco membership. The Costco's concept of international membership. The sentence that really ticked me off was - but sth should be sth sth.

Oh dear...

I used to have this sth should sth idea about the world, like my mother. Everyone around me, from my boss to strangers, kept on teaching me that - No, the world is not like that. There is no should. The world is as is.

I also learnt that the should  brings frustrations and disappointments. Knowing that the world isn't a matter of should made me a better and happier person.

I ended up telling my mom to deal this when the time comes and no need to spend time on things this trivial for the future.

I still feel awful.

Join Love - Sky blue infinite scarf for mom

Join Love is a long cowl (loop scarf) using simple lace pattern. It was knitted flat and used kitchener stitch to join the ends, making the scarf seamless and an infinite loop. The yarn is a fingering weight, 100% cotton.

My sister and I went shopping for yarn. It was a hot day. We dragged our luggage and maneuvered around Taipei train station. Our train was around 1:30 pm back to Taitung and we had about one hour to find the yarn shops. We had planned to make a summer hat (with brim) for my mom. Since my sister doesn't knit (and has no interest of learning), we decided on - 有錢出錢，有力出力。

I have vast interests in crafts - sewing, knitting, pottery, etc. My sister, on the other hand, is only interested in crafts that's related to math and medicine (i.e., cut paper of specific triangles using math formulas, and surgeries). 

We finally decided on a light blue yarn.

I attempted to make the hat but gave up in the end. The yarn was too thin and lack the proper structure for a nice summer hat. Then a while back, I ran into the lace pattern. Half way through the project, I decided to make the scarf into a long cowl. I called the scarf Join Love, because this is a joint effort of my sister and I, in a loop, to my mom.

The finished project is 19*120 cm. Used 60 grams (165 meters) of yarn.

焦慮指數破表

移民局動作超慢在審核工作證申請，面對公司人資部的詢問工作證事宜，讓我極度焦慮。

這樣的焦慮感使得專注力下降，做什麼事都沒有精神。想要寫得好幾篇網誌:國家公園遊記、釀啤酒日記等，都沒有進展。

連躺在地上滾的心情都沒有。

一週記事

這一週小姑來訪，所以很多時間都花在聊天、談合作計畫。剩餘的時間又很棒的完成多項housekeeping事項，如:燙衣服、洗衣服、折衣服、煮飯、吸地板、記帳、訂票、倒回收、訂啤酒自釀組、查電信方案、去AT&T買預付卡、拍商品照片、製作燈箱、批貨、打電話回家、訂旅館、繳水電、換好事多會員卡。

uh...這些事情只能用瑣碎來形容...不過我今天終於catch up on很多items，所以可以坐下來寫雜想。

* * *

好幾年前，當我開始和醫師交往後，知道的人都會說：唉呦，以後當醫師娘喔。然後用模糊語言明示或暗示醫師娘好命呦(i.e., 在家數錢)。

在家是有啦，數錢我就不知道了。醫師娘真實生活公開:

燙衣服

我知道有免皺襯衫，我也買了免皺襯衫。我們家的每一件上班襯衫都"應該"免皺，所以我一直期待這些衣服乾了會很挺。實際上是這些襯衫洗好乾了後都還是"不挺"。老闆昨天把一件上衣和一件褲子放到我的梳妝台上，說要提醒我燙衣服。結果我對老闆說：你放這裡只會被我丟到地上，不會有"提醒"的功效。哀，到了美國我都燙前面、後面、袖子、領子，連口袋都燙 (vs. 以前都只燙白袍遮不到的地方，如前面)。

比太陽早起床做早餐
這邊沒有美而美也沒有7-11；老闆已經上班夠可憐了，總不能每天都讓他吃bagel塗果醬配香蕉。

去繳水電房租買菜等其他瑣事。

* * *

今天又對於"感情"和"談戀愛"一事有雜感。

想念喜歡的人是很正常的事情 我在揉麵糰的時候終於想懂了早上的對話

愛情 愛情讓人快樂讓人哀傷 想念阿 在乎一個人 每一個呼吸 時時刻刻 有一天 你會感覺想念一個人而他就坐在你旁邊 那是真的想念的心痛

想念 愛情 感覺 喜歡 傷心 在意 患得患失 親愛的小孩阿 這是很正常的阿

愛情就像學游泳 傷心就像嗆到水 多喝水沒事沒事

要怎麼告訴一個17歲情竇初開的大小孩：愛情誠可貴，自由價更高，而手足則是你最好的盟友。

要怎麼告訴他：世界很大，不要被綁住。

* * *

做水餃包子

今天又做了水餃囉! Dumplings made from scratch.

* * *

樓下喜歡聽的音樂類型很多，從流行音樂 (I won't give up by Jason Maze)到某種不知道的disco pop(?)。
每當他音樂用得我聽得到，我就會覺得是我得罪他了嗎，需要這樣懲罰我。又還是因為我得罪他了，所以他就把音樂調大聲作為報復。

所以我剛就拿了一盤(六顆)剛起鍋的韭菜豆腐豬肉煎餃去巴結鄰居。他還很關心的問音樂有沒太大聲 (@@...)。但是他很開心喲!

* * *

最近胖包超人的原料和麵包又吵得沸沸揚揚啊! 要怎麼說呢? 其實食品健康的問題早已爆炸了，只是大家都不知道(或是忽視)而已。我們以為的食物根本就不是我們以為的食物。舉例來說，外面賣的蘿蔔糕沒有籮蔔絲，怎麼能有蘿蔔味? 就更不要說餅乾、洋芋片、熱狗(這是什麼食物?!)。麵粉並不是白色的 (麥子不是白的，所以麵粉要怎麼變成白色呢...)，因此白胖胖的饅頭是要怎麼做出來? 還有芋頭饅頭 (我小時候還滿喜歡吃的...) 我煮過最新鮮最新鮮最新鮮剛從土裡挖起來的芋頭，芋頭的顏色"頂多"是混著不知褐色的淡紫色，所以芋頭饅頭也滿神奇的。還有肉丸、魚丸、貢丸...

還有阿，美國不是沒有食品安全的問題。

* * *

最近有人又說要多"關心"公衛醫師。
ㄜ，我不覺得這是一個"關心"問題，而比較像是一個"尊重專業"和"停止內鬥"的問題。講到這我就一股氣。

* * *

週三做了一個light box。上、左、右各用一盞燈，使用燈箱拍商品照片。小姑和我要一起開一間店鋪在網路上賣手作品。不過週三只拍了1/5，看來要再至少一天半才能拍完所有的商品。

以上報告完畢!

有聲書

暑假的六週，沒有影集可以看，但有有聲書陪伴我煮飯、鉤毛線。Ba

趁今天下載新書，順便list已聽的書目。前三本屬於非小說文學，我覺得很educational，學到很多，inspired到很多。其中第二版和第三本都加深了一個我已知道，但是要更加練習的概念:要成為一個field的expert，反覆練習是關鍵。

第四本內容很好，結局很哀傷。已鉤毛線的過程貫穿小說，讓我很能echo鉤毛線的過程和心情。最後一本屬於打發時間故事。這系列已出19本，每一本我都有看，沒什麼教育意義，屬輕鬆小說。

Thinking, Fast and Slow Daniel Kahneman

中譯本快思慢想。網路上寫中譯本翻的不精確。英文版寫得很好，我對人和人的行為有更深刻的了解，特別是在履歷表和行銷方面。

Back of the House: The Secret Life of a Restaurant Scott Haas

一個心理學家到有名餐廳做field study，觀察餐廳的運作和員工的態度；讓我對餐廳有更多的認識。

How Children Succeed Paul Tough

這本提出新的教育觀點，探討究竟是IQ還是EQ決定人的成就和發展。

The Friday Night Knitting Club Kate Jacobs

Smokin' Seventeen Janet Evanovich

A long day

This was written last Friday. I had one of those break down days. I don't want to deny how bad I felt, as all these are part of the new life. Part of giving myself another chance.

The day finally is coming to an end. After a sleepless night and finally fell asleep on the couch in the study at 5 am, waking up several times in between. With back aches, I crawl back to bed after the smokers left the complex.

I woke up finally at 9 and had a conversation with my brother that I sympathized. With all my heart, I hope he gain the wisdom to solve problems in life that are inevitable.

I wanted to scream.

Then I called my landlord and told him my sleepless night. He was kind enough and said he drop off a ventilation fan for us to suck the air out in the bedroom/blow the bad air away the window. I thank him gratefully. He has been kind to us, and tried his best to address my difficulties with the smokers next door.

I surfed the net and wrote an e-mail to my doctor. Then I burst into tears for the third time this week. The door bell rang and I went to get a package from downstairs. I ran into the neighbor with loud TV and thank him for turning the volume down. He also sympathize my situation. Though it doesn't bother him because he has A/C on 24-7.

Then it was two o'clock. I read, surfed the net a bit more, before cleaning up the kitchen and biked to the library. I sat by St. Mary by the Sea and read when my landlord called and said he'll drop off the fan for me.

I biked home. Installed the fan. Not sure if it will do what my landlord hoped - push the smoke away. It was a kind gesture of him and I knew that I have to follow his lead if I want him to help me fix the problem.

Then I showered, drank soy milk and wait for my husband to come home.

Speed training

I did a mini speed training at the baseball field today. I biked 1 mile to the field; did 7 or 8 rounds of speed training, and biked 1 mile home. It was mini if not tiny, but I was so out of breath and my heart was racing like crazy.

This was the first time that I ever stepped on a baseball field. It felt like being on a baseball field. The next field, three guys were batting. I was not too impressed and also fear being hit by the balls.

I read a few days ago that runners who do not engage in speed training are prone to injury. The argument was that the body is doing repetitive works by the time the performance hit a plateau.

That made a whole lot of sense and is probably one of the reasons why I stopped improving and started having knee injuries. The biking has helped a lot on building muscles and I have been throwing in running once a week (for two weeks now).

I came home and did some post-run yoga with Youtube. I feel refreshed and relaxed now.

My mind was cloggy before I left for training. I was trying to process information I learnt this morning and dissect my feelings. I told my friend, before I left for speed training that -

I feel weird talking about it because this is his/her thing, and I'm afraid that I'll be judging the person. I didn't realize that I am very protective. I fear that the person will get hurt, and I have very conflicted feeling to my fear. I think I wouldn't have this fear in another scenario, and I think it's wrong of me to have double standards.

I have learnt that words are powerful, and can be interpreted very differently. For example, if I say: you will have to face me if you hurt X. The phrase is certainly protective and my intention meant well (also threatening), but it is also signaling that I don't trust X to protect or stand up for him/herself. 

And I feel bad for my parents, who will have to learn, accept, and make changes. I can imagine that this is a shock to them. My dad, who can't even dealt with my illness, has to learn to accept the world in another perspective that he never anticipated. This is like teaching old dogs new tricks. Life is hard as is, why makes it harder.

When my dad couldn't dealt with my illness, I could brush it off (not easily, but still) because I realized that being ill was not equal to failing. I was disappointed at him, but could sympathize with his feeling and frustration. He felt the daughter is no longer perfect and took this personally. While the truth is life is not perfect, it was perhaps difficult for him to accept this fact when for he has been so proud of his creation.

As for my mom, well, I don't know. Sometimes, she has the strength to accept life as is, while other times complaining about trivial and mundane stuffs.

Finally, this really cute song that I like, Cups, performed by Anna Kendrick.

 Now, off I go to drink my dinner (i.e., soy milk with real soy beans), and then to my weekly heart-to-heart session with real Americans.

約會40天

這週看完了目前到第30天的 40 Days of Dating。這故事是在講兩個紐約客，他們都彼此單身，彼此在感情世界中都有自己的堅持和個性。他們參與一個實驗，決定約會40天。這個實驗有幾個規則，其中包括每天都要見面，一週要約會3次，要一起出去一個週末旅行等。

目前連載到第30天。原本我只有隨便看幾天，後來發現這太有趣了，決定從第一天開始看。網站有點不容易navigate，但是一旦發現方法之後，就發現網頁設計做得很好。

感想
1. 網頁設計特優
2. 電視上的紐約客故事是真的
3. 單身的生活很刺激，很好玩
4. 單身的感情世界很累
5. 聽他們去這個餐廳那個表演覺得小羨慕
6. 人生要過得豐富
7. 他們對於表達自己的方式都很豐富和有創意 (他們都是做設計的)
8. 我無法像他們那般熱愛工作
9. 紐約好好玩
10. 有點希望被拍成電影

洋蔥炒青椒，花椰菜佐番茄醬

這篇全部的重點只在我浪費了小火慢熬的蕃茄醬，然後準備了一碗奇怪的晚餐。

(附註: 小綠眼說蕃茄醬非常好吃)

在米國，均衡飲食竟是似奢侈的生活模式。

前幾天到超市買了"過熟出清"的特價蕃茄。這樣的蕃茄其實正好吃，所以我就拿了幾顆來做蕃茄醬。

晚上，煎了明天午餐要用的雞胸肉條。鍋子的油拿來煎洋蔥和青椒，接著拿這鍋子煮水燙青椒。

對於一個會做控肉、包肉粽和烤千層義大利麵，這晚餐還滿奇怪的。

Turning 30

A former college, who will be 30 next week, has been posting lots of 30-related status updates on FB.

She posted an article on Glamour on Olivia Wilde's advice for turning 30. I like Olivia Wilde.

http://www.glamour.com/entertainment/2013/08/olivia-wilde-s-advice-for-turning-30

The two advice that I really like from this article:
1. You're 30. Stop dressing like a hobo.
2. DON'T feel pressured to pop out kids

Living arrangement

I HATE my neighbors. Between the smoking and the TV noises, I just wanted to shoot them all.

The downstairs neighbor turned down the TV last night and while I could still heard some of it, it was tiny that I can't push the issue further. I invited him to my living room and had a nice 15 minutes conversation. Tonight, it was like - hello, I'm pretty sure he turned the volume up slightly.

And the neighbors are smoking outside AGAIN. They have no courtesy.

It's like living in a zoo (a metaphor, I have not lived in an actual zoo). I am so moving next year.

短小精悍 (Seriously!)之帶錯鑰匙爬窗戶記

I went for a run, and ended up running around. 

國中畢業紀念冊上，當時的一個好朋友寫下: 短小精悍。從當時到現在，我一直不確定這是褒還貶，只在心中暗自慶幸自己不是男的。

帶鑰匙這件事到了美國之後我變得很留意。深知米國沒有三步一個7-11，五步一個鎖匠，房東5點就下班，沒有鑰匙注定是很挫的事，我就這樣小心翼翼的四年，直到上週四。

上週四早上陰雨綿綿，下午天氣放晴，我決定去小跑一下，看看這幾週騎腳踏車有沒有讓大腿肌肉進步一些。我穿了跑步的背心和短褲，頭髮隨便綁了一下，拿了兩支鑰匙就出門了。我開開心心的一邊跑一邊在內心大聲叫著: I love running, love the challenge, love the pain. No pain, no gain. I love love love feeling sweats dripping down and the muscle working, yada yada yada...I am stronger. Move forward, I love the challenge to the body. I love the challenge to the soul.

我的鑰匙串上共有九支鑰匙。公寓有前門和後門兩個出口，共有六支鑰匙、汽車兩支鑰匙、大鎖一支鑰匙。帶九支鑰匙出去跑2英哩並不是很理想，所以我就自作聰明的拿後門的兩支鑰匙。

正當我全身都是汗，打開了大樓的後門，突然發現:凸，我拿錯鑰匙了。我不死心的撞了公寓的門幾下，打不開。

好吧，我去找房東好了。

於是我就跑阿跑的到了房東的私人診所。房東的BMW敞篷車在，可是人不在辦公室。穿著運動背心的我感覺自己沒穿衣服 (I felt half naked)，決定不要在私人診所逗留，不如請鄰居載我去小綠眼的醫院拿鑰匙好了。

於是我又跑回去，敲了對面鄰居的門。鄰居是一個高中自然老師，長的比較豐腴。自然老師很爽快的就答應了我的請求。我向他借了一件T-shirt，然後我們就出發了。這件T-shirt應該是對他來說很合身，穿在我身上卻連短褲都看不見了。(這樣算是只剩1/4 naked的感覺)

到了醫院，我請他等我去拿鑰匙。我去了櫃檯，請他幫我page楊醫師。不知怎麼的，楊醫師過了很久都沒回撥。我坐在大廳，覺得很窘迫，雖然穿上了一件t-shirt，不再half naked，但是看不到短褲、穿了運動鞋真的很怪。櫃台的警衛終於看不下去，他打去楊醫師在工作的樓層，然後叫我自己上去九樓的加護病房。

加護病房不是人人都大搖大擺就走進去的，我需要有人幫我開門，然後帶我繞過一間一間的病床。電梯裡遇到一個穿著整齊的OL，他看了我一下。然後我勉強的說: I was locked out...

終於到了加護病房的護理站，護理長說他去幫我叫小綠眼。我站在那邊玩手指，他的同事看著我，我無奈的對他微笑。小綠眼聽到護理長說你太太在這邊，轉頭東張西望卻認不出我來。最後他終於看出那個站在櫃台後面只剩一顆頭的人是他太太。走了過來。我看到他說: I forgot my keys. 他說: then how did you get here? 我說: the neighbor drove me. 他說: 歐。

在此插播為什麼這公寓雖有前門和後門，可是我卻只能從後門進去。原來，在這事件發生的前兩天，我才在前門和後門都加裝了只能從裡面打開的安全鎖。因此，即使我有前門的鑰匙，我也無法打開前門。又，前門又剛換門把，所以小綠眼就把"舊鑰匙拿下換新鑰匙"。

回到了住的停車場，我和鄰居道謝和說再見，然後走到公寓後門。這時，我發現小綠眼的那串鑰匙也沒有後門的鑰匙!!!為什麼。為什麼。為什麼。(記得我們家換新門把，但是小綠眼"換錯鑰匙"，所以他也沒有後門的鑰匙)。

啊

切急敗壞的我只好又開去找房東。房東已經離開了，他的秘書拿給我一串鑰匙。回到家，發現:房東也沒有後門的鑰匙。

啊

我崩潰了。只好敲鄰居的門，然後打電話給鎖匠。鎖匠向我報價150元，並要等一小時。

4500台幣!

在一陣混亂中，鄰居的男朋友詹姆士開了前門，我從窗戶看出去，發現了我回家的路。

於是我就開了紗窗，再打開窗戶，然後爬了進去。詹姆士一直說: Don't fall back, don't fall back...

好加在我長得很小隻，因為這窗戶滿小的。然後我一邊跌進屋內，一邊大叫: fuck that 150 dollars.

為什麼帶錯鑰匙爬窗戶記會與短小精悍有關呢?

因為在此case中，身材要短小，然後要有一股他X的我不想要等一小時、付150元和不怕摔下去的倔強之氣。

* * *

後記: 小偷並不好當。要爬進出戶，也要身材對才進得去...

另，我不是很確定裝了安全鎖到底是在防壞人還是防自己進家門。


P.S. 我一邊用單手把窗戶往上推，一邊咒罵那每天在隔壁棟抽菸，促使我把窗戶關起來的鄰居門。就是因為他們一直抽菸，又在門口抽，煙味一直飄進我家，害我晚上睡不著，白天一直開開關關窗戶的。 F*** them as well.

Worse days

Today and the past week (and perhaps tomorrow, too) have been some of the worst days in the past eight years. I am sort of back to this uncontrollable emotional state, frighten and anxious over the details of each and every thing occurred. My mind, nose, and ears are extremely sensitive to the environment. Noise and sound, how are they different? Once is pleasurable while the other is irritating?

Here, I hate it. Absolutely HATE this place. The endless residential suburban neighborhoods with scatter stores - Trader Joe's, Whole Food, Home Depot, Kohl's. While some people envy my close proximity to these stores, convenience, and all, I just dislike it. Trader Joe's or Whole Food, they are not priorities in my life.

No good restaurants that I like - and so far we have gone out a few times.

Paying this amount each month and feeling like living in a dump. How is it different from living in the next city, with more crimes than Baltimore?

Here, it's all white. The mind set is white; the world is white.

全麥佛卡夏麵包 玫瑰瑪利 (迷迭香)

哈，前陣子Apple store大放送，下載了一個 app叫 How to Cook Everything. 好久沒吃佛卡夏麵包，因為之前上班實在太沒心情，在加上現在的房租是包含煮飯瓦斯，所以我就很高興的大煮特煮。

這食譜很基本
全麥麵粉 3 杯
水 1 杯
橄欖油 2 大匙 (關鍵)
迷迭香
鹽
酵母 2 小匙

橄欖油和鹽是關鍵。我買的是kosher salt (no, 這裡的kosher和猶太教沒有關係)。鹽的顆粒比較粗，我覺得味道比精鹽好，比較豐富，不死鹹。

還有另外一個關鍵是食譜上說要先把烤箱用425 F遇熱，然後放進烤盤後再調到375F。這概念在我之前讀過的另一本烘培也有提到，基本上是要讓烤箱打開時溫度不會降低太多。

第三個關鍵是酵母的溶解。我這次很嚴謹的拿了溫度計，將水溫測試確定在100-115 F之間，也是發起來的重要因素。

全麥麵粉有專門的酵母，威力比較猛。我之前用一般的酵母粉發全麥麵粉效果都沒有很好。另外，我現在改一次買一小包裝 (0.45元)，一次用完。因為我後來發現，一罐酵母雖然可以用60次，約是7元，但是即使我一週烤一次，酵母也要一年才會用完。更不用說我根本不會一週烤一次，所以酵母在冰箱久了，空氣接觸久，威力沒有那麼好。

另，麵團的最後一發有點沒發起。麵包應該是要再更澎一點，我覺得我可能給他搞太久讓他有點死掉了。

以上是佛卡夏的心得。

Thoughts on public comments and responding thereof

I wish I can write this in Mandarin, and I will probably try later. The problem is my Mandarin writing skills and thinking process disable me from writing this in Mandarin smoothly. (but please try to read and/or try Google Translate...)

I have a lot of time on hand, which means I get to read a lot and think a lot: news, scientific magazines, research studies; I also read a lot of people's status updates and comments on FB. Nearly every day, I want to pull my hair out.

Here are a three examples:

- a friend posted a photo of children in their community. A child didn't wear shoes while others did. So the parent of this shoes-less child commented that - oh my child was the only one that didn't wear shoes. Then another person commented: aboriginal tribes' children don't (have to) wear shoes. 

- a friend posted report a piece of news that cited incorrect data on HIV prevalence. After pointing out to this friend that the data are incorrect and hence the news is not reliable, this friend said: but it is good to use this incorrect and inflated data, because people will be more aware of this issue.

- a friend posted a status update stating that due to rabies, people should refrain from eating dog meats. 

Why are these comments bothering me? 

In the first example, the person made an implicit note that discriminated children (and perhaps also the parents) in the aboriginal tribes. It was stereotyping and discriminating to link aboriginals to low socioeconomic status such as no shoes were anticipated. The fact that wearing shoes had nothing to do with race/ethnicity/background, but more to do with parenting and income. (I could not care less whether the child was wearing shoes.) 

In the second example, the person does not recognize and appreciate the importance and value of evidence and that truth, regardless good or bad, should based on true evidence. Moreover, that the public should not but will be manipulated by false information.

In the third example, the person (jokingly perhaps), but made the connection that the disease - rabies, is transmitted from eating animals that were infected.

It upsets me that many people do not possess an awareness towards discriminatory comments, and a serious attitude towards evidence and science. 

I can see why this happened and why many people who also read the comments or status updates were not angry. Perhaps, this was due to a lack of training in science and critical thinking, and/or a lack of curiosity, empathy, and sympathy to the world around them. 

It also upsets me that most people do not care or realized the things that they say (or don't say) or do (or don't do) are a sign of accepting and surrendering. 

When I was younger, there would be people telling me that: oh this is not a big deal; let it go; forget about it; what can you do; it's the world, you can't change them; ignore them; one rice and hundreds of people. Dot dot dot, blah blah blah.

As I grew older, and began to think and ask myself - should I just sit on my ass and shut up about it? Is this what my education, training, and living abroad experience taught me? Should I stand up for what I believe in? 

I sometimes kept my mouth shut for the reason that perhaps a particular comment or thought was a social norm to them. As I am not part of their society or merely social group, I am (maybe) overstepping my boundary to make a comment on what I think one should think or act. As there are no golden rules in life (aside from a few) and beliefs and behaviors have a trace of history and societal values, I should not use my personal experience to hold that against them.

Woke up to a cup of coffee. 定時咖啡機 (programmable coffee maker)

週一時，神奇的咖啡機抵達家門口。

週二早晨，沒有一早起來就有咖啡，因為我把4am設成4pm。

週三，我終於 "wake up to a cup of coffee"。

在經過這麼多年的早晨泡咖啡，特別又因為我是一個morning person，所以除了跟我爸住有可能wake up to a cup of coffee之外，嗚嗚，我都是那個泡咖啡的人。

由於今天的wake up to a cup of coffee實在太感動了，讓我覺得要來分享為什麼這是值得的投資。所以我們先來basic Q&A.

Q: 咖啡好喝嗎?
A: 好喝。

在我剛來美國開始用咖啡機沖咖啡時，我一直覺得coffee maker的咖啡沒有french press or 摩卡壺好喝。ㄜ，的確是有點這樣，但又有點不是。French press的咖啡很好喝，咖啡的油脂和泡沫都喝得到。而咖啡機的沖泡技術設計/等級又的確影響咖啡的好喝程度 (聽說是這樣，否則為什麼咖啡機從20元一直賣到200元)。所以general認為咖啡機泡出來沒有french press or摩卡壺似乎可能對吧，當是用同一批豆子。

不過我在一次感恩節的party喝過了前天剛烘好，現磨現煮的咖啡後，我對咖啡機的想法就改觀了。咖啡機，用新鮮的豆子，可以煮出神般的咖啡。

經過我這幾年在國王牌即溶咖啡，法式壺、摩卡壺、咖啡機、手沖vs星巴克豆、在地豆、現烘豆等組合不專業的打滾幾年，我的心得是 - 豆子新鮮度是王道。

Okay, 其實water可能才是王道。但是我一直都用自來水，所以那不在我的研究範圍。

所以咖啡機的咖啡到底好不好喝。Good enough for 4 am. (Seriously, 我駑鈍的味覺雖然分辨不出紅酒中的巴拉巴拉berry味、earthy味、水果香、花香，etc，but I can taste bad coffee when I drink one)。

為什麼定時咖啡壺是值得的投資。因為it saves time。用法式壺的時候，早上大約需要花10分鐘的時間:煮水、沖泡。現在我省了10分鐘。而咖啡並沒有從95分變成85分。真的，it was a decent cup of coffee.

有人問我說，那這樣咖啡粉不就在空氣中放置一個晚上嗎? 這樣不會影響味道。我的感覺是 - 或許吧，但是真的沒有多到從95分的咖啡變成85分的咖啡。

我買的這台是最基本款了。我沒有去比較各款，反正就是amazon上評價好，價格也好，他也有出4 cups的。

如果你是一個morning coffee person，這還真的滿值得考慮的。

(side note - 現在美國很流行k cup。Basically, I think it's overrated。喝過很多次，覺得不值得那個錢)

看long island ferry 和下午bikestroll

早上去完醫院後在鎮上不知不覺開到了渡輪口。渡輪從Bridgeport穿越長島之聲(long island sound)，抵達Port Jefferson。每次每次我都好想坐，無奈渡輪不是普通的貴。一台汽車和駕駛要收$54，如果再加一名乘客要$16。所以單程要$70。

不過在渡輪口旁，剛好有人釣到一隻魚。這邊釣海魚的人很多，看著我也很想釣。只不過想到要要抓餌(軟軟蟲)，就讓我覺得還是算了。總不能又去旁邊的大哥面前裝可愛請他幫我掛餌吧...

下午的bike stroll騎了10 miles，走了一條新的路，經過了一下超級下坡，速度很快，覺得很爽。照例又騎到了聖母瑪莉在海邊。

最近心情有點黑，也才對黑白照片有了新的fu。

最後一張，我坐在欄杆前的公園椅。欄杆是什麼，是保護人們不掉進海中，還是阻隔了自由。

神奇的毛料縮水

我第一次嘗試羊毛縮水的創作法只有一個感想 - 這真是太神奇了!

的確。

小綠眼看到我鉤那麼一隻大襪子，問我在幹嘛。我說: 這是要felt的，等下就會變成一隻拖鞋，很厲害呦!

小綠眼疑惑的看著我。

哇啦，拖鞋成功啦!

很可愛吧! 小綠眼吵著也要一雙。

昨天開始做一雙clog，像那個台灣流行的塑膠拖鞋(叫什麼去的)?!

敬請期待

Weights Training

有一陣子，膝蓋受傷，不能跑步。肌肉沒有持續的痠痛，全身覺得很不舒爽。
這陣子開始騎腳踏車、重訓，肌肉開始又有了酸的感覺，然後身體和心理覺得很舒爽。

Music:
Just give me a reason (Pink)
The cave (Mumford & Sons)
I won't give up (Jason Maze)
Daylight (Matt and Kim)

Weights:

Shoulder:
- Lateral raise 12*3 (2.5 lb)
- Palms-in shoulder press 12*3 (5 lb)
- Seated shoulder press 10*3

Biceps
- One-at a time biceps curl 10*3 (5 lb)
- Alternated biceps curl 8*3 (5 lb)

Triceps
- One-arm triceps extension 20*3 (2.5 lb)
- Triceps kickback 15*3 (5 lb)
- Two arms triceps extension 20*3 (5 lb)

Back
- Wide row 10*3 (5 lb)
- Bend to opposite foot 10*3 (5 lb)

另外，這是一個很好的網站:  http://www.dumbbell-exercises.com/exercises/

吳郭魚、西瓜冰沙、 Job search 與 programmable coffee maker

開始進行job search之後，覺得人生又大開眼界了。去了萬人大企業面試，也去被獵人(head hunter)鑑定一番，心得三言兩語講不完 (敬請期待心得文)，目前的take home message是: 我在等買主。

今早發生的一件事讓我還不猶豫在中午前就買了一台可設定時間的咖啡機 (即設定4:20有一壺咖啡在廚房)。早上泡咖啡時，突然覺得每天早上我就浪費了住院醫師10分鐘的時間在等咖啡，佔了起床到出門的40分鐘的25%。而如果加上等待咖啡冷卻到可迅速喝掉的溫度，可能又多了3到5分鐘，也就是potentially，每天早上的咖啡使他少5%的睡眠時間。如果考慮咖啡香氣對於醒來程度的因素，還有一邊吃早餐一邊配咖啡的效用，那我每天早上用法式壺煮咖啡其實是沒什麼實質價值的行為，不如花60元買一台醒來就有咖啡喝的機器來得實際。

這幾個禮拜真的滿焦慮的，專心程度時好時壞。附上昨天的晚餐，吳郭魚排春草沙拉和西瓜冰沙。

The yoga mat

最近的heat wave讓人想發瘋。

I laid on the yoga mat. The fan blowing warm, stuffy air. I remembered what my friend said the other day about American dream. That it not anything anyone had imagined. I read a lot less than my friend. 

Golden hour and seize the day

 

昨天，趕在太陽下山前騎到了Ash Creek。對岸的房子很美，每次我都說 - 有一天我發了就可以住在哪裡了!

"Kayak into the sunset" - how romantic is that.

 Then magic, the sky lit the water into a shade of pink, orange, blue, and purple.

I biked home, ate soy milk+granola, and went to bed.

* * *

Maybe I can learn to like here. 

夏日腳踏車 - 圖書館和五金行

我騎strida在附近趴趴走已經很多週了，我還常常騎車去辦事，然後把車子推進辦公大樓。還沒有人阻止我，所以我也樂得開心。

下午高溫35度，我可能是失業太久，竟然決定要出去辦事。這很不尋常，因為我以前超討厭大熱天出去的，對於曬太陽和流汗都相當排斥。圖書館和五金行都不是非去不可，更何況我也可以選擇開車去。

騎了11公里，順道經過聖母瑪麗在海邊(St. Mary by the Sea)，幫燈塔照了一張相片。

順道提Google translate的中文翻得還滿有趣的。我把在bfars英文的那篇拿去翻譯，得到以下:

這是難以想像的炎熱和潮濕的下午。我決定把我的自行車跑腿。我不知道是什麼促使我要這樣一個不尋常的決定。當我訓練的半程馬拉松，我不會運行，當溫度高於80樓或許是休假太長木屐的頭腦作出理性的決定。

儘管瘋狂的溫度，天空是藍色的。我騎了7英哩，拍個不停在圖書館和停止在Home Depot。我總是把我的自行車成跑腿騎建設。從來沒有人說什麼。

我也騎著聖瑪麗由海，並拍了照片的燈塔。

我也收取MUVI，並計劃採取視頻這個星期。

Second Chance

我把網誌改名了。Second Chance.

搬到Connecticut是一個大轉變，轉換的過程比想像中困難很多。對氣候的不適應，對出門要開車的不適應，都讓我每天心中有中凸的感覺。當移民署又不趕快給我工作證，鄰居又夭壽的抽菸、電視開得彷彿他是聾子，我真的覺得Connecticut是一個又貴又爛的地方。

幾年來漸漸讓自己感到開心，卻在搬來這裡之後，每天都處在一種有點凸的心情。所以我說Second chance。再給自己一個機會。

我們住在Silliman路上。Silliman看起來就像 Silly man。我總覺得這是一個暗示，告訴我要保持輕鬆的態度看待人生。(但其實Silliman是一個名人 Benjamin Silliman)。

心中靠杯了一個月後，昨天我登記參加Bike the Beach活動，預計9月22日要騎20 miles。Bike the Beach顧名思義就是要沿著海邊騎。我同時加入了pledge的活動，要為這是charity ride募款: Bike the Beach 2013 - AnnBikes 

另外，我開始認真規劃暑假的腳踏車和瑜珈訓練計畫。曾經有一陣子我很認真的記錄自己的訓練過程和達成的目標，發現有砥礪自己和自我要求的效果，心中覺得很滿意。Run because i can!

最後一件事 - 我開了另一個網誌叫Between food and running shoes。這個網誌的構想才一月初就開始了。Second Chance 或 Happiness Will Come Through一直都定位在心得文、流水帳、和自言自語。而我覺得是時候練習寫一些informative性質的文章。Between food and running shoes (bfars)

親愛的朋友和家人們，幫我加油!

2013 初夏

春末抵達康乃迪爾州，那時還是雨季。下雨天的氣溫很低。記得有一天只有16度，我穿著長袖長褲整理剛搬進來的箱子。

So blessed

I/we have been so blessed this year. It’s been a long time since I had this feeling. It had been pretty rough in the past few years. Then all of the sudden, things seemed to come together.

On 12/31/2012, we saw Skyfall at the theater. I loved the movie. The plot was delicate. Beautiful story line and filmed well. The only thing I complained was I thought it was odd that M was shot. I mean, she only encountered the gunman once and thus the bullet had to travel an odd angle for her to be wounded so seriously. Anyways, we left the parking lot after the movie and the parking ticket and the voucher could not be processed correctly. Then the guy at the booth said: I don’t know what’s going on. You guys can just go ahead. So we got free parking.

Then the next day, I knitted all day.

We ran 32 km in the first week. I was very happy with the progress. Although my knee felt funny after the Saturday long run so I have been taking it easy this week.

I met with some friends on Sunday and had Thai food. We played Settlers of Catan afterwards. I won. At the Thai restaurant, my friend got free Thai ice tea (for no reason).

Work has been easy so far. I mean, yeah, my bossed annoyed me once but aside from that, it has been pleasant.

I was somewhat frustrated with my knitting because the sizes were either too big or too small. I had to unravel two gloves.

These are my new babies; I still need to make the flop for the brown one. It fitted the Chris perfectly so I am happy.

Green little eye got interviews with U Mass and the rescheduling with Bridgeport seemed to have came through. He is interviewing with 8 programs and got 10 invitations in total. I am also visiting New Orleans in two weeks!

2013’s New Year resolution is to run more.

Preignes Pinot Noir

Vin de Pays d'Oc
South of France: Languedoc

Pinot Noir: 100%

Preignes represents a true Pinot Noir: soft notes of leather, cedar, and sweet spices are balanced perfectly with red berry fruits, soft alluring tannins round out the palate. As this wine opens up richer deeper notes of tobacco and mocha ground this beauty and make a true delight.

感想：

from bottle, 聞起來有醬油的味道
外觀 - berry purple
香味 - floral, sweet, berry, 醃漬李子
實飲 - thin body, light finish, bitter

結論：
不喜歡。沒有很多層次和flavor，感覺很dull，而且不順口

2013

迎接2013年，我今天去跑了5 miles。跑完只覺得 - 爽。

一邊跑，一邊想著自己的四個興趣/嗜好：拍照、跑步、鉤毛線、吃/煮。