Bad day

Yesterday was terrible. The rhythm is off. There were so many things that I detested happened. More often, it is an obnoxious feeling that really bothers me. Just like as I sat on the sofa waiting for Way at the Gym, I could not help but wonder – is there really an invisible glass between the rest of the world and me that I cannot fully understand the cycle of the universe?


I met a friend at the gym on my way to the locker room. A friend whom I introduce her to personal trainer class (helped her got two free consulting classes). I joked with her of having time to come that evening and chatted. She asked me if Way came too and commented on his high energy. Then 30 minutes later, I saw her with the PT trainer. I was stunned. It was just on Monday that she asked for the PT's cell number and told us that the classes are too expensive and she doesn't want to buy them. Yet two days later (and BTW, I met her during Tuesday and Wednesday daytime), she went for a PT class. My curiosity lies here: why didn't she tell us that she signed up? Is it because she forgot? Is it because she was uncomfortable telling us that she made the opposite decision?


Way insisted that I am upset because I felt she didn't consider me as a friend. It is not even remotely true. I am not upset because she didn't tell me; I am upset because I can't figure out why. To me, I think this is very interesting. At the same time, I think I more or less use this incident and the reason behind it to evaluate the growing friendship. I just call it self-protection. The fact is an answer like-well, I just don't feel comfortable telling you- is okay because then I'd know that she's not that ready to be friends. But seriously, what is the big deal of not telling anyways?


The project has a new assistant.
People seemed to be annoyed by the long survey and reluctant to fill them. I had been asking people for 'favors' and keep telling myself that this is my job. Yes, it is my job. And apparently, I am on an hourly wage of $120 per hour.